More Excuses

A new fresh hell has descended upon me. I'll be up at 6:00 am (yeah, I know...cushy life I lead when I complain about 6:00 am being early) for a shoot. Today, my green screen shoot went five hours long due to a toilet paper fire in Nashville. You may read that last line again. Every word is true. At any rate, the time scheduled for Vexxarr never happened.

So, after my shoot tomorrow, I have just enough time to post the next installment of Sploorfix: Tasty Snack before I leave town for a location shoot. Then, normal update for Sunday.

...and I'll throw in a little something nice for your patience...

Promise!

Working as we speak on your tastey, new comics!

Vexxarr will continue so long as I breathe. I'm going to the auto hospital to have them look at my car's CFC's and make them cool my meat pod at the expense of the poor flightless birds located on the Earth's poles. Whilst there, I shall draw two strips. Then, I think, a nap... Know what? I like this post so much I'm going to plunk it into Blogger and share it with the other meat pods.

I'm extremely punchy...can you tell?

It's 2am Tuesday morning...

I have a meeting in eight hours whereupon I present a DVD to my benefactors (those who provide cash for my soul). After that, I make TWO comics: one for Monday, the 26th and one for Wednesday the 28th. Late, I know but three a week. That's the deal. Soon, I'll get a week ahead. Soon, monkeys will...well...you know.

So hang in there for just a few more hours and I'll keep the divine covenant. An alien trinity, if you will.

thanks for your patients and see ya after a few hours sleep!

One Of Those Mondays...

I have a big project due Tuesday so:

1) I haven't and won't sleep until it is handed over.

2) My Diet Code Red consumption has tripled.

3) Vexxarr will update either this afternoon (Monday) or tonight (Monday)

Sorry for the lame last minute warning but I had hoped that I would be done by now. Alas, no. I have a Mac and as such, IT CRASHES! Those of you who know me know my position on this. Those of you who actually know who I am know WHY I have a position on Mac stability at all. And for those of you brainwashed by Apple propaganda let me stop your letters of outrage cold in their tracks. I offer you the following:

"The application Final Cut Pro has unexpectedly quit. Relaunch Yes/No?"

"File Error: Unknown File OK?" (clicking ok will delete the source file from the hard drive while simultaneously crashing the running application)

or my personal favorite

"General Error -39"

Folks, these are, in fact, crashes. They are common and frequent (depending on the version of OS X you are running) and unlike Windows XP, Apple actually takes time out of their busy day to lie to you about the cause and severity of these issues (Microsoft, by comparison, simply refuses to talk to you). And before you Mac Zombies chime in, My liquid cooled dual 2.5 Mac G5 is running to Apple spec. It's front end bus is fine. I have no pirated software installed. Apple built it in house to order. And not only can I duplicate my crashes on every G5 I have ever used, I can come to your house and re-create them there too if you wish.

Granted I'd rather purge my eyes with hot pokers than try to do my job with XP running Premiere Pro - but Mac instability is the actual reason it's taking so long to finish this job. I don't hate Macs, I've just gotten to the point where - for what I do - they are no more and no less stable than Windows 2000. I don't edit video on Windows and I don't transcode video formats on a Mac.

Now I need to get back to my Mac and lay down more voiceover.

Bleh.

See you guys later today!

New Comic Monday!

Only one this time. I don't owe you any.

I'm about to put up a link through which you will be able to purchase your very own glossy copy of any Vexxarr strip of your choice.

When you click the link, you'll be prompted to fill out a form with the date and name of the strip in question. You will even have the option of having me color (colour) the black and white strips for a modest fee. The result will be printed on 8" by 11" glossy card stock, gamma irradiated and blessed by a priest before being mailed to your dwelling.

The cost has yet to be set but I bet that - as my first commercial offering - it will be affordable to all. Even those of you who purchase pen and paper roll playing games (you think Xbox 360 games are expensive?) will have enough liquid funds to buy one of these.

Now whether the comic will be worth the price only history can decide.

A minor goof...

Friday's comic was mistakenly labeled Comic For Wed the 14th... Honestly, it was indeed the comic for Friday the 16th.

So far I'm on schedule again.

For my New readers, I want to stress that this comic will always update three times a week. If it's late, I'll double up my postings but the total of the postings will always be five (three, sir!). Right. Three!

This comic won't go Mr. Chuck on you guys...I swear!

So once again, Vexxarr updates three times weekly. I only miss when I have projects dropped in my lap suddenly and even then, I get three strips posted a week EVERY WEEK (check my archives if you don't believe me). The down side is that Wednesday's strip may not post - strictly speaking - ON WEDNESDAY. The upside is that unlike some folks I know (with a slightly higher readership), there will be a comic up for every single Monday, Wednesday and Friday until I die. Or the world ends.

Whichever.

More reliable schedule...

Or so I hope. I'm going to actually update M W and F instead of T Th and Sa as has been the recent trend. I guess if these new guys are going to "read" me I should at least "deliver" "content" "on time"...

Is the actual biblical definition of sloth having a webcomic and then not updating it?

What would Job's webcomic been like anyway? Probably a lot like Real Life actually... I mean Greg Dean is likely the only web cartoonist out there with a more hateful schedule than mine.

Welcome New Visitors - please come again!

All ELEVEN THOUSAND OF YOU.

I love you. I hate you. I don't want to see my bill this month. But whatever you do/say/think/feel/read/eat/masticate...do NOT go away. Vexxarr has been around about two years-ish and while I might be a tad late on my postin' I've never missed my three-a-week quota.

Never.

Never-ever.

When my computer and scanner died, I went to my office and use PC paint and Internet Exploder (v6) to download old comics, and manipulate them into brilliant new comics. That shall never happen again of course - partly because I have redundant PC's and scanners now (like six of each) ...and partly because it seemed readers like my cut and paste comics BETTER.

GRRR...

But I digress...

So if you like Vexxarr, I guarantee you will get three servings of green, alien goodness a week in perpetuity...or until I die.

Whichever comes first.

Notice I didn't say three funny servings a week. You hardly get that now.

My thanks out to A Miracle Of Science who seems to be the source of my new eyeball wealth. God GOD guys. Where do you keep 'em???

Two Strip Monday!

I picked up sudden and demanding work this week and was not in town to update Vexxarr.

Sorry...

But as per my promise so many months ago - there will be three strips for every week. So Sunday's strip will post Monday with (hold your breath) Monday's!

And...

Something extra...

(I hope I was able to make that 'extra' ooze the sort of sex and appeal it was meant to convey)

Is This The New Schedule?

It seems that I have become a Tu Th Sat comic recently. I assure you that this is not going to be the case. As is often the case, this has been a busy week. I have only managed to accomplish about a third of what I needed to accomplish and the week is suddenly over...

New Vexxarr tonight if I can squeeze any more blood from this turnip and I promise more Earth shattering revelations. Well, at least revelations that might cause a teacup to rattle...if you in fact rattled it.

Vigorously.

The sad thing is...I'm really enjoying this storyline. I like the Locutron especially.