Serenity

Rocks.

Forget the anemic Return OF The Sith. THIS is the Summer movie you have been waiting all year to see. Acting, story, pacing, dialogue...I can sum it all up in one word. Wow. Just, wow.

We laughed, we cried, we held our breath and we stood and cheered on our feet at times. Serenity is the movie that reminds you why you pay $8.00 US and up to sit in crowded houses with crying children.

Best of all, Joss Wedon brought us the magic of Firefly, magnified several times for the big screen. We weren't forced to endure spurious "big name" walk-ons or additional characters brought in by the studios to "add box office cred"... We got Firefly, big and with both barrels...

So go see this film. Now! This very moment! Leave work. Better yet, call in sick. RSVP that funeral. Tell your fiance that you'll have to reschedule. It's JUST THAT GOOD.

So Let's tell the Fox Network to gun HOE-tze bee DIO-se... We all know Fox is the moron of all programming morons. But if they can't take advantage of an obvious revenue stream like Firefly, then the shareholders need to send the suits packing. Fire those myopic bedwetters and hire some grown-ups willing to actually run a company. Someone willing to sit at the grown-up's table, as it were.

So let's recap... Serenity is the movie you've wanted to see for years. Fox Network is criminally stupid. Jane may be my favorite Joss Wedon character EVER.

** WARNING - SPOILERS **

...Dumbledore dies...

THE DEVIL

Is in the details. I made a number of corrections to a number of careless errors on today's strip. Who else gives you such service? Kurtz? McDonald's? The Pentagon?

I'm not a cartoonist by trade (can you tell) but I am a comedy writer. So enjoy my offerings within that singular context. I thank those that happened on my flyer and joined me this week. I promise that there are many wonderful things in the works. Not all of them dealing with last night's pizza. Stay tuned.

Welcome new readers!

This is Vexxarr, a thrice weekly, comedy strip spinning a yarn of galactic conquest of inept proportions. I update every Monday, Wednesday and Friday and if you stick around, you'll see that the story is actually going somewhere. As such, on rare occasion, you will have to read back a few strips to collect the context of a given punchline, such as they are. In general, we are following Vexxarr and his mislaid plans to conquer the Earth for the honor and glory of Bleen and the Mighty Bleen Empire. Suffice to say, Bleen may have sent the wrong, er, man for the job. Or maybe...not.

At any rate, thank you for stopping by. Read on and please drop me a line or visit the forum to speak your mind!

Nintendevolution

The Nintendo rant has been moved to - where else? - RANTS!

The comments bandied back and forth, remain below for your amusement.

By way of an apology...

Color! Doesn't make up for being late, does it? Still...Color!

Computer Issues...

Vexxarr 105 is on the way! Sorry, an unrelated meltdown on my Mac G5 (so, so reliable) lead to a crisis involving my home network. As soon as I get my machines talking to each other again, NEW VEXXARR!

Sorry for the delay. Bear with me.

Thanks,

The Management

Scammed!

I had a wonderful time at Dragon Con and got to actually hang out and drink with persons of television notoriety. This all but makes up for the fact that we were 1) Booted 2) Robbed and 3) Falsely Threatened with Imprisonment.

Let me be more specific:

It is my opinion based on information gathered by A) Atlanta Law Enforcement B) the surrounding Hotels C) the person subcontracted to place and remove wheel boots and D) the man on the street that Central Parking - specifically in the lot on 126 Baker Street, Downtown Atlanta - is booting cars with out-of-state-tags and in effect holding them hostage for money.

The facts are as follows:

We arrived and parked at the lot on 126 Baker Street in Atlanta at 4:20pm Friday the 2nd of September.

Two witnesses saw me place our cash in the slot for our spot - #12

A note with the lot number was place around the money with our space number (again, #12)

I used the little 'rammer key' to 'ram' the money into the slot.

I checked to make sure said monies had disappeared behind the metal flange (I always do)

According to the booting subcontractor, the boot was placed at or around 4:30pm THAT DAY.

I will add here that the hotels were suspicious. The police were suspicious. When questioned, the dude who worked at the bar next door said they were crooks.

Currently, I am working with the police, the BBB and the Department of Licensing and Permits to see what's up. There are a million reasons why this could all be an innocent misunderstanding. Yet I feel that something here is amiss.

In either case, I was told that removing a privately owned boot was a felony. I believe that this refers to removing and keeping the boot, which would constitute grand theft and indeed a felony. My legal advice team (neighbors) assured me that simply removing the boot would only carry whatever penalties were associated with parking and not paying for my time on the lot. Civilians cannot charge you with a felony.

Bottom line. I'll keep everyone updated. And don't use Central Parking in Atlanta - especially on 126 Baker Street.

Presents!

For those of you clever enough to decrypt my previous posts, you know I was at Dragon Con. There, I was given a special gift by a good friend. I don't want to give away details but I will say that picture are forthcoming.

101 On The Way...

I had a slight computer hiccup. The strip is done. I'll post before noon. Thanks for understanding! Except you. Yes, you! I see you! What was that? I saw that! COME BACK HERE!

100 !

One-hundred strips! Who knew such a thing was possible? And it feels like only yesterday that I was getting regular sleep. To commemorate this occasion, I have brought color to your favorite strip...and this one too. Don't get used to it. I plan to go right back to good old B&W tomorrow. Consider this my gift to you. I sure do...

Labor Day Lateness!

There will be a Vexx on Labor day... It may just be a little late. Like Midnight late. I'll be at Dragon Con till Monday around 6pm, then I'll drive back to Alabama. Then I'll make your Vexxarr for you. Labor Day will mark my 100th strip. This is a milestone of sorts. I will oficially have done 95 more strips than everyone told me I would do. Look kids, when I finally decide to do something, I'm in for the duration. While I can look forward and see a day when I no longer write and draw Vexxarr, I can tell you that day will only come after a long and rather involved story has been brought to you in its entirity. Vexxarr is going places. There is more to the defeat of the Bleen fleet above Earth than just a minor setback for the Emperor. Oh the stories I will tell. Oh the bad punchlines you will endure.

Glorious...truly glorious...

To those living in Louisiana

Having exhausted all my hopes and best wishes, you have my prayers.

Almost no update...

I wrote, drew and posted last night's strip at 2:30am Friday morning. See what I go through for you kids? I'm editing a local TV special and it has taken three days and nights of my life and...thrown them away! All this and I still can't bring myself to miss an update. I'm home now, the deadline came and went. We counter-to-countered the final product and now I will sleep for two days.

Only waking to update the mighty Vex.

Such is my life...

A new week

And I've already downloaded my Stargates and Galactica. Long live the Torrent! There is a new RANT in the rants section...It was WAY to long to place here so I just went ahead and posted it where it would eventually be warehoused anyway. It's likely to spark some debate. But I have far too little time to debate the issue so just take my position for what it is worth and talk amongst yourselves...

Who is this hu-mon and what does he hope to gain?

I mean the utter gall! He uses MY name and then spells it all wrong and stuff. He even has a resume!

I will now cry - alone in the dark.

Refresh Your Browser!

As is often the case, I post the comic in a state of frantic desperation in the wee hours of the morning only to awaken the next day and do a few final 'tweaks'. Such is my dedication to you. Mr. Kurtz, on the other hand figures that if the strip is posted before Midnight the following day, it isn't really late, is it? I kid Mr. Kurtz because he has a keen sense of humor and his readership is larger than the population of Canada...

Anyway, Mr. Kurtz was one of the main proponents of webcomics as a dynamic medium. In other words, it's very nature allows publications to be updated live as you read. Some have lamented that this leads to billions of broken links and a sense that the web is an unreliable source for facts - a criticism with which I agree to a point. But it also establishes the internet as a very contemporary medium, in the literal sense of the word. It is a medium that we, as a collective species, actually own.

So refresh your browser to see the alterations which, in my delirium last night, I could not complete. Also skip back a day to see some of my other revisionist activities. I am insidious.

Mighty Mouse?

Apple unveiled a 3-Button Mouse just in time for it's 3-Button version of Final Cut 5 (psst... Final Cut has ALWAYS been 3-button compliant by the way). Anyway, this new "Mighty Mouse" clocks in at $50.00 US and has a nipple standing in for the wheel found on most human mice. As a G-5 user and editor by profession, I can recommend with confidence that everyone just save $30.00 and buy any of the 3-button wheeled mice available at your local electronics store.

I understand that it was inevitable and perhaps necessary for Apple to release a 3 button mouse but why did they feel the need to 'innovate' ? The reason that all other 3-button mice look and function in a similar way is that human ergonomics demand a pretty well defined set of features. We can debate joysticks, trackballs and pointers all day long but a mouse is going to look and feel a certain way as long as you are serious about using the damn thing for sixteen hours at a stretch.

But then there is Apple. Apple HAS to be different. For Steve Jobs to push a product, it HAS to be different. It doesn't have to actually function...but it has to be different. This is the man who wanted to completely replace the logical file structure of OS X with a dedicated search feature. Why open the folder where you KNOW your files are stored when you can just type in several keywords to search your files EVERY TIME YOU NEED THEM.

I find it odd that the man who arguably invented the Mac seems to have never actually used one. Well used one for actual WORK at any rate.

Quiet...almost TOO quiet.

The Vexxarr machine rolls on like an old Chevy that you inherited because your Grandparents are too old to drive. Sure your friends make fun of it but I don't see THEM offering rides to the mall on weekends...

But I digress.

It's Monday and apart from my usual big toe pickery, this means taking stock of my week to come. Looking at my calendar, I couldn't help but notice that I have no life. Except Tuesday. I always wash socks on Tuesday. Anyway, I thought I'd point out the forums. Nothing interesting in the forums today. Partially, I suppose because your kids are too darn lazy to ever visit them! But it'd be nice to hear from you once in awhile. And turn up the heat. It's cold.

What time is it?

Cake

I see that you guys start hitting your refresh button around 1am my time here in Alabama. As you may well know, I update (God help me) around 3am CST US. I'm trying my best to get back to my Midnight - 1am schedule but as a freelancer, I find myself at the hands of an unscrupulous Mac from 8am through 9pm most days. Add in trips to the gym, food and Conker's and you find me sitting down to the Vexter at about midnight.

By the way, many have asked and YES, I am indeed the Mac Guy from that video the kids are so crazy about. Yes, everything I said in the short is accurate, just some of it relates to OS 9 and some of it OS X. It's a bit jumbled. Anyway, there you have it. And a new comic. What the hell are YOU doing up at 3am reading my webcomic for anyway? Go to bed!

It's like a game we play...

Those amoral nasties are back - even if in a less impressive form - so Vexxarr responds. Really, my heart and thoughts go out to you guys. I know that as silly as it sounds, just knowing that you have friends out there - anywhere - actually helps. The green guy is pulling for you.

On a lighter note. Stargate SG-1 premiered and while the cast change is unsettling, the writing is the center of the show's strength and I can report that it remains strong. With Beau Bridges and Louis Gossett Jr. Joining the cast, the show might actually sink under the weight of all those golden statuettes these actors bring with them. As for Farscape fans, the inclusion of Claudia Black and Ben Browder should actually give you heart. First, you know where your cast is in the event of a second Farscape movie and second, you know they are at least EATING.

Over in Atlantis, SG-1's sister show, the reprise of a minor character as (hopefully) a recurring supporting one is par for the course and always a welcome surprise. The look and feel of both shows continues to impress me considering the actual monies involved (and in Canadian Dollars no less).

And of course one misses Galactica at one's own immense peril...

Robot Chicken's season finale was a tear-jerker wherein we discover that the show is indeed cancelled! ...but not really.

And the Wedding Crashers is a comedy that you should really, really drop everything and go see.

What?

You think I'm kidding? GO! NOW!